I'll Miss This



 Of the things that irritate me (and there are plenty) probably at the top of the list is toys.  Toys have taken over our space.  I step on them, trip over them, store them, sort them, store them again, sneak them out of the house only to for them to find their way back inside.  Toys make me crazy.  I look forward to the days of no.more.toys.  But today as I was straightening things around the house I had to laugh at the toys strewn about in various inappropriate places.  Ninja Turtles next to the toilet, Planes in the bathtub.  It made me laugh and it reminded me that he won't be 6 forever.  He won't want to play with toys soon.  He'll be way too cool.  His wild imagination and ability to morph into Michaelangelo with just a swing of a nunchuk will all but vanish.  So instead of cursing the toys today, I took pictures.  I want to always remember what it was like when he loved to play...

 

 

 

 

You can never have too many light sabers in the bathroom...

...or Planes in the tub.

 



 

Poor Raphael...

 



Summah Lovin'

We're homebodies - it's just how we roll.  But man, this summer was full of going, going, going.  I take it back - that was really just our September - but since most of September is technically "summer", I'm just going to stick with that!

By the time preschool graduation hit, we were setting our sites on the big family trip to Panama City Beach over the 4th of July holiday.  This trip was really years in the making if you count the years we've all been saying things like, "We really should plan a trip".  With my parent's 40th anniversary in June and my dad retiring from 31 years of work that same month, what better to do than celebrate with a big trip to the beach!

I grew up going to Panama City every summer so it was a natural choice.  We probably had not all been there together since I was in high school.  This was also Evan's first time to the beach!  Based on how much he loved it - it certainly will not be his last.

Once back from our trip summer was in full swing!  Scott and I had talked a lot about getting Evan out for some geocaching fun.  Considering how much fun he was having drawing "scavenger hunting" maps and forcing Scott and me to search for the "treasure" in the house, we knew geocaching would be a hit.  We were RIGHT!  He has loved every excursion and we've had the opportunity to "treasure hunt" in three states so far!

"Treasure Hunting" at Red Rock

Another fun activity we took part in was the Lowe's Build and Grow workshops.  Each weekend Lowe's holds this awesome event for kiddos.  Lucky for us the themes were around some of Evan's favorite movies - Shrek, Madagascar and Kung Fu Panda!   He built some of the cutest projects (and maybe a little confidence along the way!).  Lowe's also gave each child an apron to hold all their earned project patches, goggles and their very own big kid hammers!  It's been really fun for us all to participate - and it's FREE! What's better than that?

Buildin' and Growin'

 We winded down the season with a couple of fun trips.  Labor Day was spent with our friends, the Bebos, in Colorado Springs.  We enjoyed time with them on their new boat at Lake Pueblo.  Not only was it Evan's first time on a boat but also his first time being pulled behind a boat!  I was less nervous than I expected.  Evan was more fearless than I anticipated...he LOVED it!

Motorboatin'

 Apparently it was a summer of firsts; as soon as we returned from Colorado we took a camping trip to Zion National Park in Utah with Scott's squadron.  It was beyond beautiful.  Unfortunately we didn't have a lot of time to explore but we will certainly be back.  Evan really loved the great outdoors, playing with friends, and s'mores by campfire!

More geocaching fun!

With Fall around the corner we're looking forward to cooler weather and being outdoors more.  Here's hoping for pumpkin patches, kettle corn, football and fire pits!

Things and Dreams

I've packed it around since we left your very first home just three years ago.  That big bin stuffed so tightly with your tiny baby things.  Your first clothes, the hospital issue hat, onesie and blanket.  The outfit you wore home that, even in a newborn size was much too big for you.  The outfit you wore for seven week pictures; that was the day I just had to get out of the house so we made quick work of an Off Fifth stop and walk-in Target photo shoot before you needed another feeding.  The toy that hung from your carrier that you fell in love with; you would chew the tail incessantly...he was really your first Woobie.  It was all there.  Folded carefully and neatly with every memory intact.  I had never gone through it all before but today I decided to sit down with it, to go through each piece one by one, and to remember your first hours, days and months.  I've kept less of your clothing since then.  Likely because you're messier now.  You're all boy as they say and well, things just don't last the same as they did when you spent your days sleeping and swinging.  And the memories are different.  These days I keep your drawings.  I make a mental note to keep that favorite toy.  I write down the funny, innocent, sweet things you say.  Those are the things I hold on to today. 

Ironically today was also about letting go, yet again.  Today, Memorial Day 2012, you broke free of my grasp.  Without reservation you jumped into that pool and you swam your little heart out to prove to everyone watching that you are a big boy.  You, too can swim.  You, too can jump from a diving board.  You kicked and paddled and with sheer determination you made it to the other side.  The look of pride on your face was one I won't soon forget.  My heart exploded.  Later, you swam up to Daddy and me, your face pure sunshine and happiness and you said, "I have been dreaming of this my WHOLE life!"  We laughed together at your excitement and then you were off again...

Sweet boy, I didn't know what I was in for on the day we met but I could never have dreamed this big.

He's Just a Baby

Holding him tight and letting him go...that's the balancing act I find myself doing these days.  I didn't know it would happen so soon.  No one told me I'd one day have to let my four year old make decisions for himself.  I thought that came later...much later.

This is all coming from a parenting class I started attending about a month ago...Love and Logic.  The ideas make so much sense; let his problems be his problems, let him make decisions, hope he makes the wrong decision, guide him more like a consultant and less like a dictator, shower him with empathy and let the natural consequence be the teacher.  It sounds simple and right in theory.  My mind is split between "He's just a baby" and "He can play Angry Birds better than you...he's more capable than you think!" 

I wonder how little I know of his capabilities because I get in the way of allowing him to do and be.  I wonder how many opportunities to challenge him have slipped by due to my own reservations, assumptions and low expectations. I wonder how much of it has to do with me wanting to keep him little.  Actually I know the answer to that one.

The power that my influence, opinion, advice and methods have on shaping his being is mind blowing.  Or is it the responsibility I have to him that is so overwhelming?  It is my greatest obligation that he grow to be a self-sufficient, confident and thoughtful person.

So here we go. Preparation for the Big Bad World has begun and it looks like this. "Evan, breakfast is served until 7:45."  That day I actually threw away his breakfast because he chose to play rather than eat.  "Evan, the car leaves at 8:45." That day we left without shoes and he was forced to walk into the gym in only his socks. 

It sounds so harsh (and on both those occasions it has almost killed me to have to follow through) but what I know for sure is that he gets it.  He knows the decisions he should be making...it's just that he doesn't care because he's never had to.  Choosing to not put on his shoes was more my problem than his...but walking across rocks in only socks has shown him that his poor choices are, in fact, his problem.

One of the other pluses is that I'm less of a nag.  I try to cover my urge to control the situation with aloofness.  And I remind myself that I am giving him a gift in every wrong decision he makes.

Irony of a Day

There are two things no one ever told me before I became a parent; the horrific after effects of childbirth (and I'll just leave that right there) and the fact that parenting is, at times, an excrutiatingly tough job.  Excrutiating, I say!
Take yesterday for example. Drop off at school was painful; clinging to my legs like a 2 year old.  Yes, Mrs. Teacher, I know I should "just go" but I'm having a hard time peeling this 44 pound kid off my body! I was considerably bummed for the rest of the morning, convinced he was going to have a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. 

Turns out he had a great day and all was right with the world again.  Then he hit a kid on the playground.  It's so hard to go from a happy, we're going to have a great afternoon high to the disciplining mean guy in 10 seconds flat.  Cue immediate exit from the playground.  Then punishment.  Then having to tell Daddy himself why he was in trouble.  Then more tears.  Total downer.

We filled the first three hours of the quiet afternoon with lunch, hotwheel car races and block towers.  And then I had the idea to make some play-doh so that I could hopefully get a little down time to make dinner.  So there we were in the kitchen together, dinner on the stove, music playing and Evan sitting on the counter making "cake ball pops" with his purple play-doh...for almost THREE hours.  It was some of the best time we've spent together in a while...oh the irony of a day of punishment turning into a cherished memory.

Later in the quiet of night I settled in to read a blog post sent by my much wiser friend, K.  A commenter to that post said it best, "We need love the most when we deserve it the least."

 Evan next to his "oven" where his cake balls are baking...



  The finished product...yummy!

Because You're Big Now

Our Little Guy...

Tonight you lie your little head down a brand spanking new four year old.  It's been four years since I could hold your whole body on my shoulder.  Amazing how that happens...

It won't be long before you're taking my car keys and asking for gas money, not long at all.  But today, today you spontaneously told me, "Mommy, I love you."  Today your favorite color is blue.  Today Lightning McQueen is your hero.  Today there was no music but you danced on the countertop anyway.  You made voices for your balloon and had a conversation in the back seat.  You hugged your new best friend goodbye at school.  Today you pulled your socks as high as they would go "because I'm big now".  You buckled yourself into your carseat.  Today we read books about cars and jets, because those are your favorites.  Today you fell asleep on the couch because you don't take naps anymore and you were exhausted.  You lined up 23 cars in the bath tub; I know because you insisted I listen to you count them.  Today you were my waiter at the playground and you served me a cheeseburger, fries and a "dolt coke".  Today you got mad and told me you'd never play with me again.  Today you made me walk behind you because you wanted to be in the lead. You held the door for others today; you waved as strangers drove past you on the sidewalk. Today you picked up rocks to "add to the collection".  Today you gobbed too much toothpaste on your toothbrush, insisting you could do it all by yourself. You reminded me at bedtime, as you do every single night, that "after your shower I'm going to go potty and after I go potty I'm going to get a little drink of milk." Today you made sure you had all your favorite animals at bedtime; Clifford, Sally, Sparky and Buster. Today you asked me why I always call you baby...

My baby is what you'll always be.

Happy Birthday, Little Guy.

The 4th One

Today is Scott's 4th Father's Day.  It's crazy to think the little guy has been in our lives for only 4 short years.  Time is going by so quickly that I literally do have days where I wish I could bottle his sweet smile, chuckle, voice....all of it.  And of course there are days where I wish I could screw the lid to that bottle tightly so as not to hear another peep! :) It comes with the territory and I know I'm not alone.

We celebrated Daddy Day at last night's San Antonio Missions baseball game with three of Evan's little friends and their parents.  Four three year old boys, half of whom had naps prior to the 7pm game, with enough energy to light the stadium!  Once the excitement of Ballpeno, Henry the Puffy Taco and the Kentucky Fried Chicken started to wear off (around the 3rd inning), the mommies hiked the kiddos over to the playground where they could jump on inflatable bouncers and slides to their heart's content.  An especially sweet moment came when two older kids high-fived Evan with expressions of "Good job, Little Buddy" when he made one of three baseballs into the cut-out target.  He was beaming with pride...I think my heart swelled a bit more.

Just around 9:30, after watching Henry the Puffy Taco lose one more race around the bases (can Puffy Taco ever win?) when the whining hit a fever pitch (heh), we decided to call it a night.  Evan was tuckered out by 10:30 when he crawled into bed.  I crossed my fingers for a late morning...maybe I should have done my toes, too.